One of the Hardest Things I've Ever Done

Sharing that my husband has Lewy Body Dementia has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I talk a lot about aging boldly, but nothing prepares you for the emotional weight of watching the person you love slowly slip away in pieces. Some days I feel helpless, angry, or just completely drained — not because I don’t love him, but because the man I’ve shared my life with is changing in ways I can’t control. There’s grief in the day-to-day. Not just in the big moments, but in the little things — a look he no longer gives, a conversation we can’t finish, the laughter that’s quieter now. I miss him, even when he’s sitting right beside me.

And yet, I get up every morning and keep going. I’ve had to learn a new kind of strength — one that includes patience, deep sadness, and letting go, over and over again. I don’t always have the answers. I cry in private, I lean on my friends, and I talk to all of you, because I need to feel seen too. Caregiving is lonely. Loving someone with dementia is a kind of heartbreak that lingers. But I want others going through this to know: it’s okay to say, “This is hard.” It’s okay to feel the loss even before it comes. And it’s okay to talk about it, because our stories — our truth — help us carry one another.

Things I love…

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